Valentine’s Day | Northwestern Flipside

Tag Archives: Valentine’s Day

Op-Ed: I Will Be Suing Northwestern Because My Marriage Pact Didn’t Propose On Valentine’s Day

February 23, 2021 Flippy Leave a comment

9:14 P.M. Wednesday. November 25th. I’ll never forget receiving that fateful email: “Your optimal Northwestern Marriage Pact match is…” When I opened the email, I initially thought it was a joke–I mean, we only had 69.420% compatibility! And I’d never even heard of this guy. I mean, “Chad Fratman”?? Sounded totally fake. But Chad messaged me almost immediately, saying, “Hey bby girl u got snap” accompanied by a picture of a really cute thumb in a turtleneck. So, of course, I immediately

Area Man with a Blog Wonders Why He’s Alone on Valentine’s Day

February 17, 2019 Meg Carey Leave a comment

“I’m really the whole package,” Schmidt said. “What lovely lady wouldn’t want a man with a sharp wit and nearly a dozen followers on his blog?”

Area Man to Stop Calling Women “Females” For Valentine’s Day

February 15, 2017 Flippy Leave a comment

Women should be able to not have sex if they don’t want to, Holbrook said, provided that they’ll still do “stuff under the table at Chili’s.”

Area Virgin Grabs 19 Free Condoms

February 18, 2016 Alex Moisa Leave a comment

Losen has reported that since he asked a girl out for coffee on Valentine’s Day, he thought it was important that he was prepared for all possibilities.

A Love Letter from Allison to Bobb

February 11, 2015 Allison Bryski Leave a comment

“I love you the way McCormick loves the tears of the innocent.”

People You’ll Meet Speed Dating at the Celtic Knot

February 17, 2014 Caroline Picard Leave a comment

What? You haven’t been speed dating at the Celtic Knot? The Flipside did the dirty so you wouldn’t have to.

BREAKING: Flying Creature Attacks Civilians at Water Tower Place

February 14, 2014 Brian Capella Leave a comment

“I’ve never seen anything like it before. People who have never met before today are all lovey-dovey with each other.”

Ask The Flipside: Percy the Gay Stoner on Valentine’s Day

February 13, 2014 Allison Ortega Leave a comment

This week in “Ask the Flipside,” Percy the Gay Stoner tackles questions about the hottest places to go on Valentine’s Day and the best way to look attractive during the winter.

Area Botanist: ‘Condom Roses’ Entirely Wrong Genus

February 18, 2013 Brian Lee Leave a comment

EVANSTON — A local botanist claims that the condom roses sold by Northwestern University’s Sexual Health and Assault Peer Educators (SHAPE) do not belong in the genus Rosa, stating “they’re not really anything like any rose out there.” Jennifer Leary, a member of the North Shore Garden Club, made this claim after observing a sample of the condom roses, saying that based on the plant’s leaf structure, petal counts, stamen, pistil, and other parts of the flower, the plant could

A Valentine’s Day Poem

February 14, 2013 Sam Block Leave a comment

“I fucking hate Valentine’s Day,” Said junior Peggy Ann McKay. “I have six midterms tomorrow, For DM, I must donate my marrow. My roommate is such a great bore, Dating that bro two years or more. It’s much more fun to be a whore, That’s what living in Bobb is for! They hold hands watching Netflix, They think iPhones are for self-pics. He bought her Franzia with his friend’s fake – I don’t know how much more I can take.