Tag Archives: Mom

[SEVENTH GRADE ISSUE] I Can Do Anything I Want (But Momā€™s Picking Me Up at 5)

Hey, Chris, wassup? Excited to hang out later? Oh, Jesus, dude, donā€™t call it a fucking playdate- ’cause weā€™re not sixth graders anymore, that’s why! Huh, whatā€™s that? Your parents wonā€™t let you go to the mall by yourself? Jesus Christ, dude, weā€™re thirteen! They canā€™t tell us what to do! And we sure as hell donā€™t need them! Now grow some fucking balls, call your mom, and demand that she drive us to the mall! You need to be

Palin Suffering from Post-Election Tourette’s Syndrome

JUNEAU, AKā€”Alaska Governor and former Vice-Presidential Candidate Sarah Palin is suffering from Post-Traumatic Election Touretteā€™s Syndrome, say doctors at Juneau Central Medical Center. The Governor was rushed to the hospital from her hometown of Wasilla on Wednesday, January 28th and has been observation ever since. ā€œI saw her walking down the street, and went over to give her a hello, and all she could say was ā€˜Maverick maverick 9/11 terrorist Joe sixpack.ā€™ I was so confused,ā€ said Wasilla resident and

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