Trump Now Has Complete Set of Happy Meal Toys
“I got them all, folks,” the actual president said to raucous cheers from his unpaid Secret Service guards.
Tag Archives: Mexico
New Executive Order Is Just Book of Leviticus
At press time, President Trump had already cancelled the executive order after realizing that it would have banned slander, lying, showing partiality to the rich, and of course, letting your hair become unkempt.
Model UN Report: Russian Federation Gets First-Ever Handjob from Mexico
“Neither the size of Powell’s dick in particular nor the horniness of the Eastern Bloc ambassadors more generally should take away from our efforts to provide security and prosperity to the world,” the high school senior said.
[Future Issue: 2161] Evidence of Life Discovered in Mexico
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Scientists have observed the presence of single-celled organisms in Mexico, inviting speculation that the arid wasteland may have sustained life at some point in the past, and could possibly be colonized in the future. Scientists were quick to caution against unbridled enthusiasm, noting that while thermal imaging has identified possible sources of water just under the surface, probe results have indicated that the soil is an estimated 40% benzoylmethylecgonine (cocaine) and 30% concentrated lead. The new discovery
Arizona to Build Fence of Liberty
PHOENIX—Arizona Governor Jan Brewer (R) announced this week that the state would be building a Fence of Liberty to greet all those crossing over the border from Mexico. The new structure will be covered in copper, with armed guard towers aloft every 100 yards. On the US side, the fence will read July IV MDCCLXXVI, commemorating the Declaration of Independence, while on the Mexican side it will read April XXIII MMX, commemorating the passage of Arizona Senate Bill 1070, the