As someone whose celebrity crush is Flynn Rider—in his animated form, not like a human-version—I can kind of understand the Bitmoji appeal. But I can’t handle that little bitch being hotter than me, so I need your input.
“Long ago, our ancestors bided their time by their schools’ washing machines, riding out spin cycle after spin cycle in the hopes that their perfect match would need to wash their delicates and fill a void in their life too.”
Hornberger has had to restrain himself from placing the two students together in breakout rooms on several occasions. He also gave them knowing glances during his lecture on college hookup culture.
From the moment mine eyes met thine, William, ye olde Wilde Cat, I was eternally enthralled. From then until the end of time, I was, am, and shall be thine.
The two were seen bundled for warmth underneath the romantic lights of a Fenway Park box.
“Fucking has always been the foundation of our relationship, and no amount of love we have can ever change that.”
She keeps writing little notes with my name and sticking them on my door.”
Do you know what the other brothers at Tappa Tappa Keg would think if I wore pants of a color other than that of a fish? Or if they saw me wearing shoes actually meant to be worn somewhere other than a boat?
“I love you the way McCormick loves the tears of the innocent.”
Look, I don’t want to make assumptions, but it’s just that I have a feeling deep down in my cartilage that you are upset with me, and I think I know why.