Op-Ed: Watch Me Eat This Man
The man was happy. I am going to eat this man.
Tag Archives: eating
Man Eats Both Nature Valley Granola Bars at Once Like a Goddamn Barbarian
“Frankly, we at Nature Valley find this behavior a violation of our product, and Torrey’s eating habits in no way reflect the kind of consumer we wish to attract,” said John Baringer, president of public relations at Nature Valley. “Seriously, what a goddamn ape.”
Freshman Starting to Like Eating Lunch Alone, Actually
“When I come in and grab my grilled cheese and look out at all of the people sitting together whom I don’t know,” said Monroe, “I really don’t get that phased. That just means I can text my mom or read the newspaper.”
[NU Spork] Thoughts From That Guy Eating in Spanish Class
OMG, why did I take Astro and Spanish back to back? Screw it, I’m eating chips. When do I bring them out? Do I wait for group work or is lecture ok? Why does this class have to have 12 people, they’re staring into my soul. Are they judging me for being the “food kid”? Whatever, time to open them. Crap, why are these so crinkly? Is it better to just rip the bag in one fell swoop or open