Man Revolutionizes High-Five Game By Going Too Slow First
On November 8th, 2023, the world shook as a fundamental rule was broken. Children cried, priests prayed, and citizens everywhere trembled in the face of potential ruin…
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Area Freshman Loses Wildcard, Keeps Virginity
Schwartz promptly began asking each and every stranger, “Are you my Wildcard? Are you my Wildcard?” Still, Schwartz sustained his virginity, whilst being bereft of Wildcard.