IRVINE, CA—Taco Bell, a restaurant long associated with weight loss, has yet again revolutionized fast food diets with their new Seven-Layer Diet Burrito. “The fast in ‘fast food’ stands for how quickly you will lose weight,” said now-dead Taco Bell President Glenn Bell. He died of unknown causes, though an autopsy revealed a suspicious amount of guacamole in his lungs, liver, and gall bladder. The Taco-Bells and whistles of the diet focus on each of the food groups. The Seven-Layer