Named for Nelson Mandela, who helped lead the anti-apartheid movement in South Africa and worked fervently towards equality; and for Ronald Reagan, who ensured that my father’s generational wealth would stay where it belonged — in the family — rather than going to the dirty poors
“This is my dream school it’s sooo beautiful here,” incoming Weinberg freshman Meadow Deering posted to her Snapchat, accompanied by a photo of a particularly nice path next to Norris.
Many students were indignant after one of his playlists was revealed to be named “Songs to listen to while my admin guts student org funding <3.” The playlist included songs such as “Anti-Hero” by Taylor Swift and “Bad” by Michael Jackson.
Like Horton, no one seems to believe that the collection of mold in my water bottle has gained consciousness and claimed me as their leader.
In response to Northwestern’s historically low acceptance rate this year, the administration has taken drastic measures regarding how they will hand out the coveted, and now very minimal, class of 2026 spots to those on the waitlist.
It usually involves the life leaving his eyes (and going to his dick) leading to a blank stare and a gaping mouth.
The statement claimed that the editors of the paper had experienced a “severe lapse in judgment” and that they were “listening and learning” from their “oopsie-daisy uh-oh spaghettio 😢” (emoji included in the statement).
Growing up, we’re taught to clean up after ourselves. In school, we’re encouraged to leave places better than we found them. At restaurants, we stack our plates to make it easier for the staff to clear tables. I was once one to fulfill all these principles. A significant number of other people are as well, all in the name of being “considerate.” My entire worldview changed while shopping with my cousin at Walmart one day. I knocked something off a
“If I get arrested one more time, my parents are gonna cut my allowance to only 5k a month.”
Northwestern prides itself on being very accessible and accommodating students’ needs, no matter what they are. However, one student’s recent accommodation has administration racing to research this unique condition. “I’m allergic to any dorms that don’t rhyme with Kincoln or Lemper,” a rising sophomore claimed. The student further explained that he needs to be placed in dorms that specifically fit this designation, or else there would be serious consequences. “I would probably spontaneously combust,” the student said, when asked what