Substance-Free Hall Wins Beer Pong Tournament
“Ittall hashta do witsh thee whrist…”
Category Archives: Headline
NRA Begins Program to Hand Out Free Guns to People Who Look Like Good Guys
“I’m sorry sir, but you’ll need to shave that ‘stache before I can hand you one of these AKs.”
Tom Clancy Dies; Cold War Finally Over
BREAKING: Philosophy Major Receives Job Offer
Northwestern Tour Guide Walks Backwards into Open Sewer Drain
“And here we have the Thomas Crapper Memorial…”
Humanity Returns from Eye Doctor; Hindsight Lowered to 40/20
House Committee Forms to Decide Which Hand They Should Use to Jerk Off
“I’m thinking right… Can we put this to a vote? No? Okay, how about left? No? Well. I’m glad we’re all on the same page.”
Line for Mailroom Extends into Southern Albuquerque
“Now I really need my geography textbook…”
20 Hospitalized with Vicious Infection from Really Viral Video
Lindsay Lohan Dead After Overkill on October 3 Mean Girls Jokes