Already, many curd groups are striking deals with the Russian and Syrian governments to remain competitive, receiving aid in the form of milk pasteurizers and arms shipments.
In a move preceded only twice in the history of this hallowed nation, House speaker Nancy Pelosi has begun the lengthy journey that could end in — I’m sorry, I can’t do this anymore, Paula please let me talk to the kids. I’ve made mistakes. I know that. I’m not blind to my faults, babe. But I shouldn’t have to get into college at 41, feign interest at the most tedious info meetings I’ve ever been to and go through the
“I’ve never seen anything like it,” said surgeon Liam Docter. “We gave him enough anesthesia to paralyze a horse, but he just kept telling us that health care was a human right and that the current market did nothing but feed the pockets of fat executives.”
“It’s like they think they’re fully autonomous people or somethin!”
Meghan Markle did not explicitly name her son after Northwestern. Duh. As anyone who has watched The Princess Diaries would know, royals have to be discreet.
Despite what she is calling a “minor inconvenience,” Nielsen says she is trying to look on the bright side.
Democratic congressman Adam Schiff, who has spent several months threatening to subpoena a complete copy of “The Lorax”, claimed Wednesday that Americans had a right to the unredacted copy.
“Bernie has been running across the country for years, and as far as we can tell, will run until he dies.”
Melania could not be reached for comment, as she was busy staring out a White House window, her hand pressed against the cold glass, thinking of the days when she was a young girl and had nothing, and how much she took those days for granted.
“I got them all, folks,” the actual president said to raucous cheers from his unpaid Secret Service guards.