āPlus, when my professors asked me to introduce myself, I was so used to saying, āIām Artie Jones and I live in Willard,āā said Jones. āIt was tragic to have to say, āIām Artie and I live inā¦Los Angeles.āā
Unfortunately, the researchers were unable to find any students willing to speak to the reasons why they donāt speak up more.
“Itās obviously the bad vibes of the breakout rooms that are conjuring acne on my face.ā
Until recently, local teenager Jenny Dorn was an avid supporter of the governmentās decision to continue the coronavirus lockdown until scientists declare that a slow reopening can safely begin. However, she had a change of heart after her mother finished reading her third James Patterson novel this week. āLike most socially-conscious teens of my age, I thought that ending the lockdown within the near future would be disastrous,ā Dorn wrote in a widely shared Change.org petition. āThen my mom cracked
āWe are requiring BrewBike to close its stores in Evanston immediately because it is not essential now nor has it ever been essentialā
I found the perfect rainbow tube top at Urban this summer. Ever since then, Iāve been looking for the right pair of funky shorts, to no avail.
“When she finally woke me up and I saw her in lingerie, I nearly stabbed my eyes out.ā
āI donāt know who he thinks heās impressing. It was sorta funny the first week of class, but now itās just pathetic,ā said concerned classmate John Masters.
What better way, then, to light aflame the hearts and minds of my classmates than by plastering my puckered ass skin all over their laptop screens?
āItās like she used this tired gimmick to distract us from how self-isolation is deteriorating her mental health,ā said her classmate Darrell Jamison, RTVF ā22. āThe propeller looks pretty funny, but Iām not laughing. Iām concerned.ā