Ask Flippy: How Do I Convert The Shepard Egg Chairs Into Sex Swings?
All you need is a couple extra straps (courtesy of Pitney Bowes) and a plastic knife from the dining hall to carve out a hole for the head.
Category Archives: Featured
Op-Ed: My Parents Announced their Divorce, but it’s a Bones Day? A How-to on Navigating Noodle’s Wicked Ways
After reaching out to the pug, who refused to comment, I sat under a tree for 49 days, wailing and tearing my hair, until I reached enlightenment.
Op-Ed: I Just Wanted to Echo What the Other Op-Eds Have Already Said
“Piggybacking off of that, I just think the way they phrased it was really well. Well-phrased. Which time?”
Review: Dune (2021) Not At All Like Ladybird (2017)
Now, was either film actually any good? Was one better than the other? I’m not sure.
COVID test burglary results in one swab for everyone to share
In the aftermath of the theft, the one swab, dubbed “Ole Faithful”, could be found lying underneath the ransacked shelves of its fallen brethren.
Local Mobster Can’t Believe You’re Asking Him If He Stole 4,500 COVID Tests On The Day of His Daughter’s Wedding
“Authority. Betrayal. And super-spreader events.”
Ruh-Roh! Scooby Doo Found Dead in Fatal Van Accident at 52
The accident occurred at approximately 3:00 A.M. in what first responders are calling “a blatant breach of car safety laws” and a result of “some kind of drug-induced hysteria”.
New Marvel Movie Dares to Ask the Question: “What If We Made A New Marvel Movie?”
“Our goal in making this movie is to go where even the greatest pieces of cinema in history haven’t gone—by using the same formula we used the last 25 times.”
Michael Jackson Appears in Lecture, Introduces Self with Hee/Hee Pronouns
“How do you know which ‘hee’ is the past participle?”
Ask Flippy: What if President Blank’s Lawn isn’t Large Enough to Protest On? What if Her Windows Shut and Her Doors Lock??
Plus, old white people love their lawns, and I’ve heard that garden gnomes make for great projectiles.