Over in the National Guard-occupied territory of Washington, DC, people were voting on matters that are actually consequential to the future of democracy: whether we should ban foie gras.Â
This Halloween, the value of 8-year-old Marvin Schmidt’s assets exploded. While he didn’t receive a lifetime supply of treats, he certainly scored the treat of a lifetime.
Elon Musk responded on X (formerly Twitter) within minutes, calling the cold-blooded murder a “fun, organic bird-to-bumper interaction.” Tesla then posted a velocity edit of the accident to “Rodeo (Remix)” by Lah Pat and Flo Milli.Â
Ever since he was a boy, Pope Leo XIV–formerly Robert Prevost–had three dreams: To be a man of good moral character and faith, for the White Sox to win a world series, and to live forever.
We here at the Northwestern Flipside know how stressful it can be to come up with a Halloween costume that is both sexual and thought-provoking…
Sargent dining hall, perhaps the most controversial of them all, may be making a comeback. According to a statement from the dining hall’s public relations officer, Mildred Williams, they will be adding several new dishes to the rotating menu, including “goop” and “slop”. “We have heard your pleas,” said Williams, referring to recent protests outside of Sargent by the student group Nutrition Undergraduate Team (NUT). “In response, there will be goop and slop for all”. Additionally, Williams announced a new
“Tragic, but ultimately, this is the price we pay for security.”
I’ve written over three studies that show that larger wenises positively correlate with almost every metric of success for a Sims community–GDP, average BMI, homicide rate, etc.–and I know that each and every one of my Sims would be much happier with a few inches added on to their wenis.
The case unfolded dramatically, with many individuals of both high and low status accusing the embattled Biberty of misconduct, including, most recently, the GEICO gecko, who has yet to officially press charges.
As is known nationwide, Northwestern is famous for its lively and off-the-rails party scene.