Category Archives: Ask Flippy

Ask Flippy: The Doctor Said My Joints are Messed Up. How Do I Show this Clown I Roll the Best?

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Dear Flippy, Last week I went to the doctor for a long-overdue checkup (Iā€™m United Healthcare and figured they probably wouldnā€™t want to deny my claim). Overall, Iā€™m in good health! My blood pressure is down to 170/100, and my doctor said my weight is in the 95th percentile for my heightā€“which means lower than 95% of the population. How could he tell Iā€™d been dieting? Thereā€™s just one problem: He said he was worried about my joints. Something about

Read more Articles, Ask Flippy, Featured, Latest News, No. 399, Uncategorized, Year 17

Ask Flippy: How do I quietly warn tour-going High School students what they’re getting into?

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Dear Flippington, If you havenā€™t noticed, itā€™s that time of year again. All the high schoolers are lining up like lambs to the slaughter to visit our wonderful campus. But they donā€™t know the horrors. Those guides wonā€™t tell them about the last-minute dining hall crowds at 7, they wonā€™t tell them about the religious zealots on Sheridan that try to trick you into giving them your soul through free coffee, and they sure as hell wonā€™t tell them that

Read more Ask Flippy, Featured, Latest News, Local, No. 392, Opinion, Year 17

Ask Flippy: Do you think Damian Lillard says “It’s Dame Time” before he has sex?

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Dear Flippy, After watching Damian Lillard win the NBA All-Star 3-Point Contest for the second straight year, a burning question came over me. Heā€™s always introduced with the phrase, ā€œItā€™s Dame Time!ā€ and then he points at his wrist accordingly. Itā€™s cool, itā€™s fun, whatever. But I began to think about its real life applications. Iā€™ve heard that Lillard is as clutch in the sheets as he is on the court. Thus, do you think he says, ā€œItā€™s Dame Time!ā€

Read more Ask Flippy, Entertainment, Featured, Latest News, Local, No. 386, Opinion, Sports, World, Year 16
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