Op-Ed: Yes, My Zoom Photo is My Headshot. I Hate Myself as Much as You Hate Me
I know that people assume I am a pretentious asshole who is completely full of myself. All of these assumptions are valid.
Category Archives: No. 307
Circle Circle Dot Dot Cooties Vaccine Enters Testing Phase
Playground researchers have managed to develop an experimental vaccine using top notch Crayola Magic Marker technology, reducing the risk of cooties transmission by up to 30%.
Woah! Therapist Shares Tidbit of Personal Information
Before, she was just my therapist. But now that she’s, like, a real person with actual thoughts and opinions, it makes me anxious.
Classics Curriculum Of English Class Updated To Include All Wattpad Fanfics Opted For Film
In the wake of Wattpad fanfictions like The Kissing Booth and After becoming blockbuster teen movie franchises, one English teacher is leading the charge to get these works of literature where they belong: on the “Classics” section of her syllabus. Keri Schroeder, an Evanston-area high school teacher, first heard of Wattpad in 2019 when some drama students in her classroom “wouldn’t shut up” about how hot the Harry Styles fanfic they were reading was. “At first I was beleaguered, bemoaned, distraught, and in a
20 Years After Recess Tag Ending, Local Woman Remains “It”
“I can’t go out in public anymore. People scatter away from me like I’m a shark in a school of minnows, or as if I passed gas on the rush hour train.”
Confused Freshman Discovers That “I Live Right Outside NYC” Could Literally Mean Five Different States
Every year, East Coast residents capitalize on their supposed proximity to New York City, that concrete jungle where dreams come to life, to invoke awe in their geography-challenged classmates from the Midwest.
Ask Flippy: Is My Boyfriend Cheating On Me, Or Are All Those Texts Just From Kamala Harris?
I mean, if any woman besides me were to be texting my boyfriend, I would want it to be Kamala Harris. I just don’t know what to believe.