Op-Ed: No, Josh, I don’t have less friends because I’m a grammar geek…I have fewer friends
Josh, being a grammar geek doesn’t mean I have less friends. It means I have fewer friends.
Author Archives: Meg Carey
Student Wonders if it’s Too Late to Start Going to Class
Hall wondered if he should attend at least one lecture in each class so he can find the rooms where his finals will be held.
Twins Named Georgia and Alabama Opt for Name Change
“It’s like they think they’re fully autonomous people or somethin!”
A Flipside investigation: If you rearrange the letters of Archie Harrison Mountbatten-Windsor, you get Northwestern hrmnaoibsdraantiiocu
Meghan Markle did not explicitly name her son after Northwestern. Duh. As anyone who has watched The Princess Diaries would know, royals have to be discreet.
Kirstjen Nielsen Resigns Upon Realizing she Forgot Where she Put the Key to the Cages
Despite what she is calling a “minor inconvenience,” Nielsen says she is trying to look on the bright side.
City Mixes Up Arbor Day and ‘Our Boar Day’, Releases Wild Boars
In what city officials are calling an “unfortunate mixup” and “a major oopsie,” dozens of wild boars were released into the local town Gilligan, IL for the celebration of Arbor Day.
On International Women’s Day, Boss Made Sure to Call female Co-workers “Sweetie” to Let Them Know How Valued They Are
On International Women’s Day, local boss Mitchell Dawson made sure to call his female coworkers “sweetie” throughout the day.
Bobb Resident Develops Superpowers After Showering Without Shoes
Bobb resident Sean Heckerson has acquired the ability to transform into a radioactive stink bug by using sheer willpower.
Area Man with a Blog Wonders Why He’s Alone on Valentine’s Day
“I’m really the whole package,” Schmidt said. “What lovely lady wouldn’t want a man with a sharp wit and nearly a dozen followers on his blog?”
NU administration reminds students to avoid audibly sobbing when in the silent section of Mudd library
As midterm season begins, the Northwestern administration is reminding students to avoid audibly sobbing when in the silent section of Mudd library. “Please be courteous to your fellow students,” said administration member Adam Harrison. “If you’re going to burst into tears at the thought of how hopelessly unprepared you are for your exam or just because of a general existential dread, please move out of the silent section.” The administration is asking students in the silent section to, at the