“Omi-Cron Kenobi” officially least favorite character in Star Wars/CDC multiverse
Reports from test audiences found Kanobi to “get under people’s skin”.
Author Archives: Izzy Lisco
As Thanksgiving nears, uncles everywhere read a balanced variety of news, re-evaluate political beliefs, and challenge biases; nation heals
Older relatives across the United States are expanding their horizons.
New study by Nestle-Kroger-Mills-Kraft-Heinz conglomerate finds shoveling sugar into mouth at relentless pace actually good for you
The research, fondly dubbed the “Sweet Saccharin Study” undoes decades of anti-dextrose discourse. Doctors everywhere are reading the Sweet Saccharin Study with bewilderment, quitting their jobs, and wondering how they got it so wrong.
Man in Shorts Seen Crawling to Class with Dignity in Shambles
Nathaniel Bittinger’s parents were killed by a pair of jeans.
Ask Flippy: My Boyfriend Won’t Stop Screaming U Rah Rah! During Sex, How Do I Make It Stop?
“At first, I didn’t mind, since I’m tremendously committed to school spirit.”
Op-Ed: How to Drive a Wedge Between Every Campus Couple So They Can All Be as Sad as You
I conducted a completely unbiased poll sent exclusively to other lonely singles, and—sure enough—we have a scourge of couples on campus.