
NU Sex Week Shrinkage Attributed To The Cold

“It’s not usually like this. It just seems smaller because the cold forced us to cancel some events, I swear.”
“It’s not usually like this. It just seems smaller because the cold forced us to cancel some events, I swear.”
“So, like, okay. The idea is that by burning a girl at the stake we’re making her sort of like a phoenix, where she dies all weak and gross but rises from the ashes in the image of sorority excellence.”
‘Honestly, he’s been trying to break them since 2002. We’ll see how it goes now.’
“We have only the finest and most authentic Chinese beer at this thing. If that doesn’t play out, pouring some soy sauce in Busch Light normally does the trick.”
Despite some red flags—Wright claims that Pines did not even catch the fish he proudly displayed on his primary Tinder photo—she advanced him to the next round.
MertĂĽtis and Blomquist originally drew high praise from other white allies for being so progressive as to have a woman portray Martin Luther King.
“The kids are still going to be fucking hogs. We all know it. But now those kids are going to be fucking corn-fed hogs. Maybe even hogs grown in cages and forced to take growth hormones. Believe me, this university is going to see a spike in hog-fucking-related injuries.”
“I’m so glad I came to Northwestern—these are the kinds of opportunities only a top-tier university could offer,” she said, examining her new Cartier diamond watch.
As of Tuesday, there has been a single response to McBride’s post. Grace Lin’s “lol”.
“As soon as we saw the angry Twitter posts and op-ed articles in The Daily Northwestern, we knew that our event was a major success.”