Disclaimer: We at the Flipside have a long tradition of writing drunk articles on Dillo Day, but after the shocking results of the presidential election, we decided to expand our substance horizons. A staff writer under the spell of the devil’s grass documented his reaction to marijuana’s legalization in several states as well as Donald Trump’s victory:

Throughout the United States, weed has become legal in 4 states as Trump has become President. That way, California, Nevada, Maine, and Massachusetts have found a way to subvert the Trump Presidency by being so high as to forget the next 4 years.

The legality of weed first began in Colorado, when the state decided to legalize for some reason. Since then, legal weed has grown across the West Coast and in Alaska, for some reason. Legal weed allows for a wide variety of advantages, like getting high and making friends. Mimsy, a fucking moron, agrees that weed lets people connect and try to get along. Legal weed, overall, makes America Great.

Perhaps Trump’s Presidency can make America great again by making drugs legal. Or not. Fuck Trump honestly, and it’s hard to say what will happen next. When climate change screws us all over or nuclear fallout begins, we can at least get high along the west coast as it all comes to an end. At least, us Californians can.